DAY 31: What This Feels Like

By "this" I mean the writing of 31 posts, which is way more than my average of 1 post per month.

It's hard, but it's also something that is always on my mind as I go around doing my other daily tasks. I would do some house chores, thinking what to write when I have 30 minutes to spare. Then of course I decided that I didn't have those 30 minutes, hence some pieces were posted way too late.

I was also surprised finding out that I could string some words together despite having "no moods to write", I guess they're right about hunting down your muse and grabbing her by the hair. I hate some posts, but I do like some of those written after clubbing my muse and chaining her to my desk.

They also say the more you write, the easier it will become; and this hasn't quite happened to me. Somewhere along the way though, I develop a scary idea which is to start another blog. Scary, I told you. Maybe they should add that the more you write, the more ideas will flood your brains...and if you're not careful, you might develop Scary Ideas like starting a new blog.

DAY 30: This Sure Is Not Easy

I do have an idea all along that writing everyday is not easy. But I didn't expect it to be super hard, which it turned out to be.

I still long to be a freelance writer..but I think I am keeping my day job.

DAY 29: MAKING YOUR MARK

Last March marked my 8th year of being in my current job, a faculty member in a university. I cannot say whether I am happy or sad about the fact. The other fact is: for the next 5 years I have to stay with this university because it has paid for my schooling, back in 2007-2010.

People (career "experts", job counselor, your aunt) readily advise you to look back from time to time, thinking whether you have made significant contributions to your workplace. I rarely do this, out of general laziness mixed with long lists of things to do daily.  And when I do, I realize with horror that nope, I don't think I've made enough contributions to the workplace where I spend so many of my waking hours at.

All these years I have been focusing only to study more, becoming better at my field. I have set goals for myself, without thinking about the faculty at all. Of course I realize that when I get external research grants, the faculty gets credit too, so I guess that's some sort of contribution on my part. But what I have in mind for whatever project I am working on, is to build a bigger, better CV so that one day I can flee this place and work in a better place.

So there. Whenever you see me working diligently, typing a research proposal madly or doing endless simulations for a research: I am not seeking to contribute to my current workplace. On the contrary, I am preparing for a job in a better place. Ha.