ON A BROKEN CELLPHONE

She called yesterday, all cheerful and hopeful as usual. From this distance, thousands and thousands of kilometres of lands and water, all I could hear was that comforting voice I have heard all my life.

I didn't ask her the dreadful questions. My younger brother promptly asked her about 'stadiums' and such, and I fled the place, pretending to be busy with something else. (Have I ever told you how good I used to be at pretending? And how bad I am with it now?) Then he called out to me saying she wanted me on the phone, and I wasn't done crying, actually, so to conceal the tears while walking to the phone I told my baby bro that I'd broken my cellphone. He didn't look at me as he gave me the receiver, I didn't look at him either. He said he was sorry, and I said yes me too, and we couldn't be sure, I guess, whether we were talking about my broken cellphone or something else, something more dreadful.

When I put the receiver over my ears: comfort and hope were what I heard. She didn't sound distressed, she laughed when I told her stupid trivial stories about my piano students. I told her I bought them cute stickers, and she promptly said "I'll buy you some here, if I can make the time."

If she can make the time out of what, she didn't say.

"What are you having for lunch today?" she asked next, and I began sobbing. Funny, isn't it? Hers was a question so simple, I could just say meat and potato, and she'd be contented. But I had to cry and thus break her heart. Then she said he wanted to speak to me. He sounded hoarse. I could barely speak. "CT scans and bone-scans results will be out soon," he told me, and I looked around at the fridge the ceilings the phone everything at the same time and not seeing anything at the same time.

Then he said he wanted to speak to my older sister. So I called out for her, unable to conceal my breaking voice. I saw my brother removing his glasses and wiping at his eyes -- I looked away and he told me this cellphone that I broke, could I still get it fixed?

And I told him no, the repairshop said there was no way for it to be fixed, and we looked at each other, tears gleaming in our eyes.